He's The King Of Rock 'N Roll; Just Ask Him And He'll Tell You So

Here's a short and fairly stupid post, but what the hell; I don't want this blog to die so I need to tide things over until I work up the effort to think of something more interesting.

So, here it is: I think this would be a good playlist:

1) Mercury Poisoning - Graham Parker
2) Venus - Television
3) I Feel the Earth Move - Carole King
4) Life On Mars? - David Bowie
5) Drops of Jupiter - Train
6) Saturn - Stevie Wonder
7) Uranus (The Magician) - Gustav Holst
8) Hot in Herre - Nelly (produced by the Neptunes, of course)
9) Pluto - Bjork (admittedly, I've never heard this song)

Any suggestions!? I went with Venus since it's a better song than the Velvet Underground's more famous 'Venus in Furs'. I also don't really need to hear Drops of Jupiter again, though admittedly I always sort of enjoyed it. Anything for Uranus? Granted, paying tribute to the famous orchestral suite isn't so bad. Better Neptunes song?

Throw in some extra shit like Radiohead's 'Planet Telex' and Pink Floyd's 'Interstellar Overdrive' or 'Astronomy Domine', plus some stuff for the Sun and the Moon, and as Carl Weathers would say, baby, you got a stew goin'.

It's 1857, we're an hour or so south of Salt Lake City, and it's time for a rant.

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This entry is fairly short, but we're about to hit the road for 26 hours so I figured I'd wrap up the Vegas portion.

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Two personal grooming notes:
1) I actually don't think I've ever used conditioner outside of a hotel room, with the possible exception of a two-in-one like Pert Plus. I'm not sure why. I like the way my hair looks/feels/handles itself, etc., after using it. I may have to add it to my regular routine.

2) I enjoy having skin soft enough that, if necessary, I can dry shave with little to no irritation. Because, you know, sometimes the whole shaving cream thing is an unnecessary to-do.

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AKA 'The Entry That Will Get Me Fired When My Future Boss Stumbles Upon It Five Years From Now In Random Google Search'

It's 1306 on our final full day in Vegas, and we're up after a lengthy and confusing evening. Here's what transpired, and this could take awhile.

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I hope to take in at least one Vegas show. There's one that's being advertised everywhere called Peepshow, though it is a bit pricey. SHIT ED'S COMING!!!!
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The room service menu here is admittedly a bit limited
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Boredom, as metaphor


Like a creepy old man luring children to his gingerbread house


The Beast

Here we are. It's 1501, Mountain Time, approximately 20 miles from the North Dakota/Montana border. Matt is driving, and I'm in the passenger seat with a blanket covering my head to reduce glare on the laptop screen.

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Oh yes. There will.

Alright, we have a new rule here on this blog, established at 1:26 AM on Tuesday, the 28th of July in her Majesty's Year of 2009 Anno Domini. From now on, when something is going on outside that prevents me from sleeping, I get out of bed immediately and write about it.

Note 1: Had I started this series a little bit earlier, this would have been log number four or five already.
Note 2: Normally I wouldn't even be complaining at 1:28 since I'd be up, but on this particular occasion I happened to be following up a very draining weekend with an overly excitable Monday. The point is, I'm a fair guy, but at a certain hour domestics disputes and other annoyance-a-ned-ness-es should be taken inside.

So, today's Reason I'm Awake is some sort of hooting exhibition. Three or four different voices were simply, for lack of a better word, hooting, off and on for at least 15 minutes. At that time, a police car came by to analyze the situation, though I don't think anyone was hauled off.


Anyway, as of 1:31 the hooting has ceased.

Lawrence, Saleema and I are in the midst of exchanging CDs (or rather, 80-minute playlists that can be easily burned onto CDs). Since I've certainly been known to blog about less exciting things than that, and since things have been a little slow around of late, it seems like a good idea to discuss what I hand-picked* for them.

*i.e. songs I like that they may not be familiar with

1) Jimmy Cliff - The Harder They Come (Part II)
We open with a reggae song that's credited (along with the film of the same name) with finally getting the genre some exposure in the States. Personally, I think it's better than anything Bob Marley did, anyway. I should also note that this is "Part II" because there's two versions on the soundtrack album; both are really similar, and I went with this one since it's a bit shorter and I was having a hard time coming in under 80 minutes.

2) Sparks - This Town Ain't Big Enough For Both Of Us
A goofy little pop-rocker from a band that's apparently cited as influencing such mighty acts as New Order and Morrissey (source: Wikipedia!). Some nice guitar to match the amusing falsetto; I think it's about some dude who can't ask out girls.

3) Echo and the Bunnymen - The Cutter
I've really grown to love this song in recent months. The thing about Echo and the Bunnymen is that, for whatever season, the lead singer reminds me (and probably only me) of Bono, both with his voice and his passion. He really sells every line, even ones as ridiculous as 'spare us the cutter / spare us the cutter / couldn't cut the m-m-m-mustaaaaaaaaaaaaard!' Anyway, that passion is necessary here because otherwise the song's aggressiveness would completely swallow up the vocals. It starts off with a weird but not unmelodious synth rhythm and moves along simply enough. Then right when you think the verse/chorus/verse structure is established, a whole new (and really awesome) groove kicks in at about the 1:45 mark and raises the song to another level.

4) Wire - The 15th
Short pop song off Wire's third album; just a really pleasant melody, and the synth/guitar jam in the final minute is great.

5) X - Johnny Hit And Run Paulene
A punker about a guy who shoots up some sort of sex drug and is forced to have sex every hour for 24 hours. Naturally, he, uh, turns to rape. Also the guitar is clearly nicked from Johnny B. Goode. What else do you need!? I should also note that X are, I think, clearly the best the L.A. punk scene had to offer and something about this song is way more listenable than your typical Dead Kennedys/Black Flag-type fare.

6) XTC - No Thugs In Our House
Another loud, stomping rocker with a New Wave sound (similar to 'The Cutter' in that respect). Funny lyrics about a kid who's some sort of sociopathic Fascist, but his parents refuse to admit it. It could maybe use a better chorus (the 'and all the while Graham slept on...' part is great, but the actual 'No Thugs in Are House!' is merely average) and is maybe a little long (something which I've noticed before with XTC, as minimal as my experience with them is), but definitely catchy and fun.

7) Brian Eno - Golden Hours
Now we're entering the slower/quieter portion of this playlist, which will last for about 55 more minutes; that's obviously somewhat unusual given how my musical tastes usually slant, but things just sort of turned out that way. This is your basic, more-or-less melodically perfect and oh-so-magnificently-produced pop tune from Eno, one of the handful of tracks on Another Green World that has vocals.

8) John Cale - Paris 1919
Speaking of uncharacteristic, it's an orchestral-led tune from the usually avant-garde Velvet Underground co-founder! Aside from the general sweetness of the whole thing, it's the little touches that make this song great, such as the line 'William, William, William Rogers' when 'William Rogers' would have sufficed, or how swell it is to hear a Welshman pronounce 'Champs Elysee.' I'm not sure what it's actually about, other than overarching references to the infamous post-WWI peace conference. I just like lines like 'vaguely carry us away,' 'claim you with my iron drum' etc.

9) Lou Reed - Lisa Says
Naturally if we have a Cale song, we must follow it up with Lou. This is a do-over of a good, simple Velvets song; but this being the 70s instead of the 60s and Lou Reed now being a solo artist, it naturally gets the full bombastic treatment with colored girls singing background vocals, shimmering guitars and whatever else. Something about it does it for me, and I prefer it to the original. And it's proof that Lou Reed can actually sing if he wants to. There's also a new section (the 'why am I so shy?' part) that isn't part of the VU version.

10) Public Image Ltd. - Poptones
Easily the least accessible song on my playlist, but we all need to try something new, right? A most certainly un-poppy song from Johnny Rotten's post-Sex Pistols band, I just love the dissonant feel of the whole eight minutes. If it's not for you, I understand; try and get through it by zoning out and listening only to the bass.

11) Sam Cooke - Bring It On Home To Me (Live)
Even more than 'A Change Is Gonna Come,' I think this is the definitive Sam Cooke vocal (and therefore, the essence of soul music crammed into five and a half minutes). And to think that a year ago I didn't even know of it's existence. I also suggest watching the opening to Ali (aka the best part of the movie) for a re-enactment.



12) The Kinks - Strangers
Straight from the world's greatest singer to one of it's worst: Dave Davies~! Alright, he's not that bad. The key is, Dave always has passion and sincerity, and sometimes that's enough.

If I were the type of person to link to a clip of The Darjeeling Limited that apparently prominently features this song (personally, I haven't seen the movie), I would do that now. I am, however, not that type of person.

13) Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds - Watching Alice
Are you aware that, having been released on 1988's Tender Prey, this is the most current song on my entire playlist? I really need to get on that. Or maybe I don't. Anyway, it's your typical dark, depressing Nick Cave song about a voyeur that's been secretly watching some woman for years and years. A great, moody piece; and that harmonica part is strangely heartbreaking.

14) Isaac Hayes - By The Time I Get To Phoenix
Yes, it's the reason I only had space for 15 licks: an 18-minute soul song! However, I refuse to call this a controversial selection since it's so clearly awesome and unique. For starters, there's an eight minute monologue to open things up. As in, the song doesn't begin until 8:38. And there's still 10 minutes to go. You'd think that would get boring upon listen number 50, but you'd be wrong.

From there, it's your basic slow, orchestral builder that everyone's secretly a sucker for. You slowly get the swelling organ, piano, horns, etc. My personal favorite, the simple snare drum. It begins to really emerge at 13:53 and reigns supreme thereafter, doing little more than 'bam-bam-bam-bam-bam-bam-bam-bam, crash.' But just TRY to not rock out. Or soul out? Whatever.

And not only are the vocals amazing, but Isaac Hayes gets away with improvising things like "I'm gonna moan now... mmmmmmm....." A truly singular experience.

15) The Jim Carroll Band - People Who Died
Just in case anyone fell asleep.

I always liked that Noel Murray had to say about this song in his Popless column for the Onion A.V. Club:

"If you're only going to write and record one truly memorable song, I think you'd want it to be something like "People Who Died," a cathartic shot of nostalgic nihilism that encapsulates Carroll's music career: It starts out with palpable excitement, then it repeats itself a few times, and by the time its done, everyone's pretty much ready for it to be over."

So yes, while this one clearly overstays it's welcome, it's still, currently, my most frequently played song in iTunes. Obviously, Jim Carroll did something right. Or maybe I just like punk.

A financial dilemma:

I got my new apartment sometime in late April, paying a pro-rated rent for the 10 or so days I was in there. On May 1, I wrote up a nice $750 cheque and handed it to the landlord for my first full, official month's rent.

A couple days later, he informed me that, actually, my rent for that one exact month is only $602, since that's what the previous tenant had agreed to before bailing.

(As an aside, I've been saying for two months now that I'm really quite positive they're trying to gentrify this building, which explains that hefty increase and also explains how happy the landlord was to meet a young white guy who works from home as a sportswriter.)

So, he asked if he should just tear up that cheque and have me write a new one, or if I'd rather just pay $602 for June's rent before switching back to $750 going forward. Since I don't actually have a checking account and just get the bank to print me up a small number every few months, I didn't want to waste one so opted for Plan B.

Somehow, someway, in the midst of all this confusion my May check was never cashed. After a couple of weeks I assumed they were just slow, but today my online bank statement reflects that June's payment (for $602) has already been cashed, and it's only the second of the month.

Basically, as of this moment I've been given 750 free dollars.

Now then, the dilemma is: do I really have it? This isn't a moral question of "should I inform them of the error"; we all know that's simply NOT going to happen. However, am I going to need to keep an outstanding balance of $750 in my account at all times, just in case six months from now someone notices the error and cashes the cheque? What amount of time has to pass before I can stop being worried?

If the landlord discovered this in November and it bounced, I'd at least have an easy argument that it wasn't my fault since he should have done it sooner, and I doubt I've have to pay the usual penalties or whatever, but it would still obviously be quite a hassle. And while it's not as though keeping a balance of $750 is too difficult, when I'm trying to pay off credit cards and a car loan having money around that's not being spent simply does not compute.

I'm just really not sure here.



*Alternate post title: 'Money For Nothing?' It really was a tough call.

Just for the hell of it, here are some words that, for whatever the reason, I can never spell correctly (although perhaps this should really just be changed to 'type correctly'; I'm really not sure. It would be interesting to find something handwritten, say an old essay question on a final exam, and examine my spelling). Granted, it's gotten to the point that thanks to Autocorrect and other handy features I needn't even bother trying anymore, but that's neither here nor there.

1) definitely
It's that second e that's a killer. Usually I go 'definitly' or even 'defenitely', and only actually spell it correctly about 40% of the time.

2) Cincinnati
This one annoys me, because I know exactly how to spell it but I always end up typing double-T, or an early double-N, or something else. As far as place names go, I also inadvertently go 'Philidelphia' instead of 'Philadelphia' about half the time, and Tennessee is a real bitch.

3) inadvertent
It's 'inadvertant' 100% of the time.

4) necessary
Mix up C's and S's and whatever the hell else.

5) exercise
Spell it excercise. This one is at least pretty common, I think.

6) accidentally
With my life on the line I'm still writing it with just one L, damnit.

7) cemetery
Definitly (ha!) another common one, but like most idiots I want 'ary' at the end. Along this same line, I always type 'independant' but then remember to backspace and change the A to an E before the red line of death pops up on the screen.

8) committed or commitment
Either I forget that the former isn't 'commited' or remember that when writing the latter and try and change it to 'committment'.

9) gauge
It still doesn't look right. Are we sure it's not 'guage'? Positive???

10) restaurant
I usually write 'restaraunt' and can tell it's wrong, but still don't want to fix it.

11) jewelry
Pretty obvious and I'm surely not the first person to mess this one up.

12) Juan
Alright, so this one is just weird. I ALWAYS write Jaun. Like, even when I was typing it above just now I wrote Jaun and had to correct it. You figure it out. It can't even be a natural tendency to type A's before U's, because if that were the case I wouldn't fuck up gauge all the time.


This is making me feel both angry and stupid, so that's enough.




And yes, the error in the post title is a joke.

Point form!

Here's what Chris and I did today:
-Got up before six
-Searched at the border
-40 at duty free for eight bucks
-Perkins in Grand Forks
-Four star hotel in Minneapolis
-Taunted a bunch of Milwaukee kid fans at the Twins game (but they started it. And the Twins won.)
-Gave a high-five to a kid who was between 0.5 and 1.5 years old (for sure. And his dad allowed it. And this was just me.)
-Karaoke (Chris: Travelin' Band (CCR), American Woman (Guess Who); Ed: Walk Like A Man (Four Seasons), Fat Bottomed Girls (Queen))*
-Skyway! (So ashamed....)
-Sleeping in one king sized bed. (The price you pay for a cheap four star hotel...)


*Brought the house down!

It's hard watch this video and not picture Winnipeg, isn't it?

Texas, and homeward
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New Orleans
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Nashville and Memphis
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Yes, it's time for that annual blog entry. The one so big that it needs to be divided into four parts. I present: Whirlwind '09: Southern Comforts!

Now then, this is of course far too long since I'm writing it so I can remember a couple years from now everything that went down. I shant take offense to anyone who skips/skims. There's some pictures within, but by then end of the day I'll upload a bunch more onto Facebook.

Also, I should probably proofread this a little better, but what the heck, I'm tired.

Part 1: Opening drive, Chicago, Louisville
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